A Useless Thought with Shaun Maloof

21 Dec
A Useless Thought with Shaun Maloof
Often times I hear the question if you could be any animal in the world, what would you be? I wouldn’t be a big intimidating king of the forest bear. I wouldn’t be a sleep on your couch all day while you work dog. I wouldn’t even be a look down on everything while I glide through the sky hawk. I don’t think there are many people out there that would choose to be a goldfish but I’m one of the few. Here’s why. 
Goldfish have the most fun of any animal on earth. Sounds far-fetched? Well consider this. Goldfish have a 3 second memory. Crazy, I know. You could never be bored with that. Shit would never get old. I’d be wicked easy to care for too. Just give me some of those goldfish corn flakes or whatever you feed them every once in a while and a swim-thru castle. Maybe even throw in one of those pointless plastic plants that are always associated with domesticated fish. 
I’d just be swimming around in my two gallon wonderland and all of a sudden “ooooh a castle!! I’m gonna go check this shit out.” Swim inside of it and look around. “Meh, whatever, nothing great in here, I’m going back outside.” Three seconds later, “ooooh a castle!! Hopefully there are corn flakes inside. I can’t remember the last time I ate.”  
That would happen over and over again. How could that ever get boring? It couldn’t. Nothing but pure entertainment for those three to four weeks that you’re alive. If I was a goldfish I wouldn’t be afraid of death either. I just lived like a king in Atlantis for the three weeks I was alive so lets be honest, I had a good life. So flush me down the toilet, throw me in the trash, even bury me if you’re that die hard about goldfish. I don’t care. I can’t wait to be reincarnated as a goldfish.

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