Man Child Pt. 2

27 Dec

Men can be Man Children without being sick. And I’m about to tell you another way a man can express his inner child. I don’t know if you were ever subjected to Star Wars, unfortunately my brother was hooked on it as a kid, which meant I had to endure the movies repeatedly. I can’t tell you how many times as a kid I stepped on toy Millenium Falcon paraphernalia that was scattered all over the living room floor, but I can tell you it hurts almost as bad as stepping on a Lego. Or if your a guy, as bad as stepping on a Polly Pocket.So yeah, I had to watch Star Wars because my little brother was obsessed. I shouldn’t say “was” though. At a party he threw last year, I noticed my brother and his friends were being super quiet (they were in the basement, and in my house you can hear everything through heating vents). After a few minutes of silence, the vents in my house vibrated with the Star Wars theme song. I guess it was a Star Wars themed party. Hey, at least it wasn’t a stripper party, so to each their own. When I started dating my boyfriend I was kind of bummed to learn that he was a closet nerd who, like my brother, loved Star Wars (nothing against nerds, just against Star Wars). Not only does my boyfriend love it, but his #2 hero is a Star Wars character. Maybe you’ve heard of him…his name is Boba Fett. I didn’t know much about Boba until 5 seconds ago when I just Wikipedia’ed that shit and learned that Mr. Fett is a bounty hunter hired by Darth Vader to find the Millenium Falcon. Like Dog the Bounty Hunter only not real and inspired by George Lucas. Yeah…So Boba Fett is my boyfriend’s hero. And I think that’s kind of adorable that he has a hero, so I encourage it by purchasing him the Star Wars complete saga on Blu-Ray for his birthday. Part of the gift was the promise that I would watch the movies with him. I fell asleep in roughly 16 minutes during the first one and haven’t popped it into the PS3 to watch since, but it’s the thought that counts, right? And I consider myself a very thoughtful girlfriend. Just the other day I was waiting in an INSANELY long line at a store purchasing Spanx to give the illusion that I was 10 pounds lighter over the holidays. Out of the corner of my eye, I see a big box with a Boba Fett mask inside. Immediately I thought, “Wow, my boyfriend would shit his pants over this Boba Fett mask”. So I bought it. And sure enough, he was ecstatic enough for a fashion shoot: Even I got in on the Boba Fett Fashion Show 2011…Exciting, I know. But I started to grow wary of the gift I presented him with when he turned the PS3 on and started playing Call of Duty with the mask on: Ugh, I know: MAN CHILD. The day after he got the mask was Christmas…and I guess I wasn’t the only one who noticed his love for “The Fett Man” (as he lovingly calls him). Yup, his brother’s and their girlfriends got him some Fett odds & ends as well. So obviously, we needed a second fashion show that showed all of the Boba stuff: Yup. This is my real life. I don’t think I’m alone, every guy has an inner nerd, and a hero that makes him even nerdier. As long as your boyfriend’s hero isn’t Jeffrey Dahmer, or your girlfriend’s isn’t Aileen Wuornos, it’s not unhealthy. And as I mentioned earlier, Boba Fett is only my boyfriend’s #2 favorite hero. Sorry Bobes, but my boyfriend’s heart belongs to Robocop. He’s watched it 17, 346.5 times, so I guess I should feel sorry for myself, too. But I’ll save that for Man Child Pt. 3 I guess.


One Response to “Man Child Pt. 2”

  1. stephanie December 27, 2011 at 8:03 pm #

    Molly I feel your pain, but let me tell you what’s worse…..a boyfriend that is obsessed with Star Trek!!! Now those guys have problems!!!

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