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Bitch It Out With McDonuts

1 Mar

Don’t know who McDonuts is? Neither do I. But she leaves hilariously blunt comments on my blog and Facebook page, so I told her whenever she feels the urge to bitch someone or something out, to email the rant to me. She also found love at Staples. Here’s her first bitch out.

Crazy Bitches On Facebook by McDonuts
Since Facebook came along it seems like white trash got whiter. Legit your duck lips are ugly and makes you look like a bigger whore, however it’s not only duck lips. Let’s go over a few things:

Status updates every 30 minutes
I have been guilty of this many times, I’ll admit it. But you’re 20-something, have no kids no job, and suck at life. I at least have no life, stuck in a house with 5 kids who run a muck and I sit on my fat ass, so what else do I
have to do? So updating about hanging out with your man means you really have no man and hang out with your mom who has retired and knits and still makes you pb and j. You are not cool. Updating about “yo baby daddy not payin yo support this week” and how on earth will you “get yo man his new kicks fo his birfday.” um hello? White trash? No no no sorry, ghetto is more like it. Your welfare checks and child support should go to your kids instead you are posting pictures of your drunk ass at “the place” on a Tuesday night in your new DEB (is that store even open anymore?) tank top next to yo man wearing his new Nike kicks.

Ghetto typing or ghetto spelling
“I aM So HeLlA GhEtTo… mII boii Iz sO GaNgStA.” “I knoe dat ain’t rite but hell lern da truth.” Hello! I’m the worlds worst speller! I hate spelling, hate hate hate it! But even I know it is KNOW, jeez.

Or how about the…. “my life is so dramatic I make it even more known on
Facebook” bitch
Example: “Oh just to let everyone know if you have something to say then say it to my face instead of me hearing it through the grape vine!!!!! I am so tired of people having shit to say about my relationship!!!! Guess what this
might be a big shock to everyone, IT’S MY RELATIONSHIP!!!!!! I love :insert poor bastard here: and :insert poor bastard again here: loves me so get over it!!!!! Go get your own RELATIONSHIP!!!! AND YES WE ARE
ENGAGED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” First hold your roids and slow down on the “!”. We are not as excited as you. Second, this only goes to show me you were sitting on Nany beach smokin butts after two weeks of dating wearing your Juicy bikini saying you are getting married because you love him and he treats you right because he
buys your pills and needles.

So that is just a few things that get me going. I know I’m not perfect and actually Facebook is my outlet to the outside world but come on! Now off to delete some ghettofabs off my Facebook.

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