Things Guys Talk About

21 Sep

Ladies, have you ever shut the F up for a moment and listened to what guys are talking about? Trust me, it will make you laugh. They don’t even need to be high to talk about weird shit, they just do it with a clear mind. A few minutes ago, my coworker was talking to Ryan (my boyfriend – he and I work at the same place). I stopped typing an email and listened to what they were saying. Keep in mind that Ryan literally just stopped by to drop off a Red Bull to me and then go back to his department, so you’d think they’d be exchanging small talk. Nope. Here’s what I heard:

“Yeah man, I used to LOVE dinosaurs.”

“Yeah, but ya know, the older I got, the less I cared about dinosaurs.”

I don’t even remember who said what, but I just started dying laughing. Like, what the hell are they talking about?! Who talks to someone for 2 minutes in the hallway and brings up their decreased interest in dinosaurs through the years. So F’ing random.

It reminded me of other instances in which I stopped talking and listened. There was this time a girlfriend and I were gabbing amongst each other in the backseat of a friend’s car. The boys were sitting up front talking. There was a moment of silence between my girlfriend and I where we both just sort of looked out the window and listened to the guys talking about some cool stalactites and stalagmites they’ve seen in their lifetime. We were in the back seat talking about our social lives or some stupid TV show and they are in depth talking about fucking rocks. I love it. It’s so cute.  I don’t even know why.

I swear, it’s not just my boyfriend and my guy friends. When they aren’t talking about boobs and football, all guys love to talk about the nerdiest shit. They could also sit through the most mind numbingly AWFUL SyFy movies for hours on end. I’ve seen Ryan do it countless times. They don’t even have to start the movie from the beginning – which is bizarre to me, how do you get into a movie that is midway through? They can flick to a SyFy movie and it can be the most horrible acting in the world, most ridiculous plot and special effects, and they still love it. Then they talk about it. I brought Ryan to meet some of my family for the first time a few years back and 1 minute after introducing him to my uncle, they were talking about SyFy movies they watch. They were saying how bad they are, they just can’t stop once they start. They knew no names of any of the movies they watched. They just described them by their ridiculous plots.

What else do they love to talk about? Outer space. Honest to God, my boyfriend stalks aliens. Every alien movie that comes out, we have to see. Prometheus? Check. Fourth Kind? Check. Super 8? Check. Then there was that one when the aliens live in the slums of some city on earth and their space ship comes to pick them up or something, I forget the name. But regardless, guys LOVE aliens. My boyfriend knows all the terminology and him and his old roommate used to stay up every night to catch the 2am reruns of The X-Files. It was so strange to me at first because before dated, I had no inclination that he was a nerd. But he is the biggest closet nerd, and I am starting to think most guys are. I’m not talking shit, I think it’s adorable when my boyfriend sends me text containing links to the latest alien encounter or Bigfoot “sighting”. I love it. Like, thanks for sending me a the link to a website to something that is the furthest thing on my mind. It really does put me in a better mood on a bad day.

So like I said girls, shut up and listen sometimes. It’s funny and also informative. Plus it will keep you from gossiping for like 4 minutes. Guys, keep us laughing with your secret nerdiness and Snapple cap knowledge.


3 Responses to “Things Guys Talk About”

  1. overthinkingmind September 22, 2012 at 7:32 pm #

    Boys do seem to talk about the most random shit! Yesterday I walked in on my boyfriend and his friend talking about which powerpuff girl they would want to be…seriously.

  2. sarah kane September 26, 2012 at 4:16 pm #

    Yes, my boyfriend is obsessed with Mars and all things Mars and loves to post outer-space things on my FB! And the Sci-Fi movie half-way through, fah-get about it! Glad i’m not the only one out there that experiences this all the time! I will be sharing this with him! Thanks for the laugh on a day I refuse to do anything at work!

  3. Quincy Chick September 26, 2012 at 6:07 pm #

    This is funny guys do say random shit- but not a ONCE have I heard my hubby or any of his friends talk about sci-fi or any of those topics just bullshit like work more work maybe hockey, more hockey and some football. I’m bored just describing it. Anywho good point amusing to hear guys pointless gab sessions.

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